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gator_girl22
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Name: L.J.
Birthday: 5/16/1983
Gender: Female
Interests: Reading, writing, and anything that involves going outside and basking in nature. Hiking, photography, my friends, nature, playing in the rain, taking long walks, nature (did I say that all ready?)
Expertise: I'm really good at being short. :) I have been told that I'm a good listener. I listen to people talk about life. I don't live it. I'm really good at living vicariously through other people.
Occupation: Student
Industry: Nonprofit
Message: message me
AIM:  tigervirus23@aol.com
MSN: mysticme_21@hotmail.com
Yahoo:  jraylene18@yahoo.com
Member Since:
2/8/2006
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| I have a hard time figuring out what goes in the minds of some of my friends. There's this one friend who is so completely clueless and blind to what should be very evident and yet it's not. I feel our friendship slipping further and further apart to the point where I can't even see what we have in common any more - there's really nothing to talk about. It always saddens me when I reach this stage in a friendship. Sometimes time only makes things worse. So, life is going great for this friend - things are falling into place, dreams being realized - and I'm sitting here trying not to cry because they don't see - don't even realize - that I'm not around (mostly because of papers and such and I so want to graduate on time) and it hurts that I am so easily forgotten by this person. I guess it hurts more because I used to be the friend who got the most attention. I know it sounds shallow, but I never had friends growing up who actually wanted me around. Now, I do and I guess it stings a little to know I've been replaced. Anyway, enough of this depressing emotional stuff. Time for homework.
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| This past weekend I went away to a marriage retreat. Strange, I know, since I'm not married. It was on Biblical perspectives of what marriage should be with believers. It was so good and informational and practical. It was a husband-wife team teaching it and they touched on both the male and female aspect of everything. It's amazing how many things we already know about ourselves and don't about the opposite sex. The benefit of this retreat was to show women how to learn to cultivate their weaknesses to better serve their husband in areas that he needs and for men to do the same to better serve their wife in areas that she needs. It was all about listening and understanding the needs of each other and how to resolve conflict, accept gender differences, and so much more. Women are so much about the caring, nurturing and loving that we assume that what we need is what our spouse needs - love, affection, etc. But guys are wired different. They need respect, affirmation and trust. It's hard for both to give what the other needs. A woman must learn how to respect her husband and show that in trusting him to protect her, do for her, and be responsible. In turn, a man must learn how to love his wife and show that he is open, willing to listen to her and not try to fix the problem, be close to her, and just affirm that she is valued and loved. Both love and respect are equally important and vital to a marriage's survival. The man is supposed to lead and the woman is supposed to help. God created woman as a helper to man to do for him what he cannot do for himself, but first the man must be willing to admit that he can't do everything. There is just so much more that went into this weekend that shone light on the aspects of marriage and being able to hear from a couple who have been through it all and had to learn this stuff the hard way was so amazing. It was a benefit to all who went and I wish that so many more could have been able to experience what we all did this weekend; and that they could learn and grow in understanding and wisdom in what the Bible has to say about marriage and the interaction of men and women. I am no longer as pessimistic about my single state as I used to be. I do know that there are still possibilities out there for me. I also have had reaffirmed that I am in a season of waiting. God's not done with me yet and molding and shaping me into a woman who will be ready for marriage some day to the right man. There have been times in my life where I thought that maybe I had found someone that I could see myself married to, fancied myself in love and unable to love anyone else in the future; but, I have come to realize that now is the time for my own spiritual growth and time with God. I need to give God my whole heart and life and let Him guide me where and to whom He would when the time is right. I am looking forward to the future, but in a way I am also mourning my idea of "what might have been" in my past and in the present. With God, I will conquer all things and increase in strength. Amen.
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| How is a woman to know if a guy is interested in her? Where's the line between friend and friendlier? Well, I have this guy friend that I have a lot in common with. We talk about movies, books, music, everything and anything. I have a lot of fun hanging out with him; but, I can't tell if he likes me more than a friend or not. Sometimes I get the feeling that he does and sometimes I don't even know what to think. I do have the tendency to read into things more than is actually there. I can't ask because that would just be awkward and what if I'm wrong? Embarrassing!!! But, and now here's the bad part, if he does like me as more than a friend what do I do? There has been a keeper of my heart for the past year - he doesn't even know he has it though. Would it be wrong to encourage someone I knew I might have a chance with despite the fact that my heart will never truly be free? I don't think I could do it, but I don't want to hurt him either. Or maybe I'm just imagining things and I'll never have to worry about it or find out one way or the other. Who knows?
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| Brain...refusing to function....information overload....I really hope my brain doesn't implode.
Recreational reading....good. Academic reading....bad. Too much to absorb....can't take any more!!!!!
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